The most important thing to know about Gomez is that he does not want this paragraph to exist.
In fact, we really only know two things for sure about Gomez:
1) Gomez isn’t even his real name. No one here even knows his real name. Is he in the witness protection program? Is he running from the law? Is he a superhero by night? We don’t know (honestly, we all feel like the second option is the most likely, but we’re not ready to rule out the third, either).
2) He is an installation wizard.
This is actually Gomez’s second stint of employment here at The Stick Company. During his previous time here, he became proficient in the art of wrapping (the “w” at the beginning of “wrapping” is crucial to this sentence), but then left us for a long while.
Now he’s back. What was he doing in his time away? We have no idea. Guesses around the office have included space exploration, prison time, being a member of Daft Punk, studying abroad at Oxford, traveling the world as a mercenary sniper, and being trapped outside his home under an abandoned refrigerator.
What we can tell you is that the man is Picasso with a blowtorch and a squeegee in his hands. And that’s enough for us.